Rather be a man then a women
heartGuide to Romance
review internet personals providers side by side

Huge selection of beautful flowers for inexpensive prices!
flower shop


heart
Dating Sites Directory
Gourmet champagne gift baskets in all designs for all occassions!
champagne baskets


heart
Singles Resources
Best deals on chocolate gift baskets for chocolate lovers!
basket ala chocolate


heart
Dating International

love balloons


heart
Advice Articles Tips
choose from a large selection of wines and gourmet snacks with cheese
wine & cheese


heart
Dating Humor Jokes


always free to send messages with our personal ads
free personals | singles directory | matchmaking sites | dating services | adult personals

Poetic prose - It's Good to be a Man!

Reviews of the Top 100 Online Dating Services & Matchmaking Sites!

Howdy Pardners! Are you perhaps in need of a good humor fix? In search of some funky sex trivia of facts about the opposite sex? Well congrats! You found the Shangri La of Internet jokes, strange facts and weird statistics! All presented to you completely spam free for your enjoyment. You'll never find any pop up or flashy banner ads, and we never use spyware to grab your ISP or track your movements.

And hey, if you're a single man or woman, we have totally free of charge personals to help hook ya up! We hope you get a few laughs from the largest spam free humor archive on the world wide web. Remember, laughing daily can actually extend your life span. Cheers!

Learn about male redneck behavior! Hey! You found the Web's largest archive of love, sex and romance related facts and statistics about human sexuality! A virtual knowledge base and reference to any and every thing you always never needed to know about sex related issues and behavior!

We review all the hottest dating services and offer romantic products at the best deals you'll find on the Internet. We also feature totally free of charge personals for singles. You'll never find any spam, pop up ads, pop under pages or spyware of any kind within our singles network. Have fun!

Life's Rules To Be A Perfect Redneck Man

1. Don't call, ever.

2. If you don't like a girl, don't tell her. It's more fun to let her figure it out by herself.

3. Lie.

4. Name your penis. Be sure it is something narcissistic and unoriginal, such as "spike."

5. If you lose something that belongs to someone else, tell them you mailed it to them.

6. Here's a good pickup line, "My girlfriend's pregnant, will you go out with me?"

7. Drink Vernors.

8. Play with yourself. Talk about it.

9. Be as ambiguous as possible. If you don't want to answer, a nice grunt will do.

10. Always remember: You are a man. Therefore, no matter what, it isn't your fault.

11. Lie.

12. Girls find it attractive if a man has had more women than baths.

13. Never ask for help. Even if you really, really need help - don't ask. People will think you have no penis.

14. Women like it when you ignore them. It arouses them.

15. Vanity is the most important trait for a man to have. Whenever you pass a reflective surface, check you hair, clothing, etc.

16. If you don't like a girl, but can't think of a good enough reason why, just come up with trite, meaningless explanations like, "I don't know. I just don't like her personality."

17. If, GOD FORBID, you have to talk to a girl on the phone, use only monosyllabic words and noises. Bodily noises are permissible.

18. TWO WORDS: Hack and spit.

19. Everyone finds a man more attractive if he can write his name in urine.

20. One sure way to make a girl like you is to go after her best friend. She will then see what she's missing and love you for not giving up on her.

21. Tell her you will call. Then, refer back to rule #1.

22. Say things like, "Wha...?"

23. Don't wear matching clothes. People will think your girlfriend picked it out, and it will cramp your style on picking up chicks.

24. Lie.

25. Deny everything. Everything. 26. Good break up line, "It's not you, it's me."

27. If you like a girl, tell all your female friends about her. Because if any of your female friends like you, they'll really want to know.

28. Don't have a clue.

29. If you get a clue, pretend you didn't and disregard it.

30. No means yes.

31. Yes means no.

32. If you don't get sex whenever you want, your balls will shrivel. Enforce this rule at all times.

33. If anyone asks, you have had sex in all possible positions and locations. Improvise.

34. Much like an orgasm signifies the end of a sexual peak, sex often signifies the end of a relationship.

35. Feelings? What feelings?

36. Tell this to your girl before you have sex, "Don't worry. If you don't have an orgasm, you won't get pregnant."

37. Life is one big competition. If someone is better than you at anything, either pretend it's not true or kick some ass.

38. Gays are an unacceptable part of our society. Take it upon yourself to personally irradiate all of them from the planet.

39. DO NOT make decisions about relationships. If you are backed into a corner and must make a decision, stall. If you still must come up with an answer, leave yourself a loophole for escape. Example: Question: "Honey, will you take me out for a romantic dinner?" Answer: "Yes, if you can guess how many sperm I produce each day."

40. Every sentence that anyone says can be contorted to have sexual meaning. Do so.

41. At any given opportunity, point out how things look like various genitalia. If, by chance, you have Play-Doh, make sure you make an exact replica of your penis. Measure to make sure it's right.

42. Lie.

43. "Love" is not in your vocabulary. don't even think about saying it.

44. A general rule: If whatever you're doing does not satisfy you completely in 5 minutes, it's really not worth it.

45. Ditch your girlfriend. Beg and plead until you get her back. Ditch her again. Repeat cycle.

46. Lie.

47. ALWAYS apologize. NEVER mean it.

48. If you hurt someone, pretend you care. Don't.

49. Try to have a good memory, but it's OK if you forget trivial things.

You know, like your girlfriend's b-day and eye color.

50. Ignorance solves problems. If you can't see them, they can't see you.

Top of Page - Top Personals Sites | Adult Dating | Matchmaking | top of page | home

Every Top Internet dating site can found right here! We've joined the best dating services available so you can read a complete full page review to see if they provide the type of matchmaking service you might desire. All match sites offer various free memberships or trial periods so you can place personal ads with them all to maximize your efforts.

For a quick one page comparison of the top singles sites, check out our compare popular dating sites chart. Should you prefer a quick loading and easy click graphics page with no text descriptions, click here for our quick click dating reference page. You can also access and read in depth reviews of every leading dating site on the all listed dating sites page. Free memberships are available on all match sites!

Relationships Humor Jokes - Dating Sites Review - Free Personal Ads


Copyright 2001-2006 www.internet-free-personals.com All Rights Reserved
Totally Free Personals, Matchmaking Site Reviews and Dating Site Directory!

site map l privacy disclaimers l all dating sites l advertising l contact info



All The Rage

prepare to laugh!




single bloggers!